ZERO :: the Fool (annwyd) wrote,
ZERO :: the Fool
annwyd

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The Worst of Dugandzic: Greatest Hits Album

Dugandzic writes the best vocabulary sentences, really. Okay, not really.

Cavalcade- a procession
The cavalcade of neophytes marched in the hallowed halls of Dugandzic-land in awe.

Infinitesimal- extremely tiny
The amount of knowledge you have about a lush life is infinitesimal.

Insinuating- slyly suggestive
"What are you insinuating about Springsteen?" the teacher asked as the student rolled his eyes as the mellifluous music played.

(I feel so dirty now. I like a lot of Springsteen's stuff.)

Thwart- oppose, baffle, frustrate
As a powerful native of the Bronx, my attempt to thwart the crook from Crooklyn was successful.

(Let me remind you that this man teaches Art of Writing.)

Tiddly- slightly drunk
Feeling a bit tiddly, the underage drinker hurled chunklets of chow on the police officer.

Flabbergast- to overwhelm with shock or surprise
Flabbergasted, I accepted the award for World's Greatest Human Being- again!

Vagrant- a person who has no permanent home or regular work
Realizing he needed to back to school, the vagrant went to Dugandzic-land.

Languid- lacking energy, liveliness, or vigor
The languid punk never did any work, leading to his expulsion.

Deprecate- to express disapproval of; to belittle
After getting a poor report card, my friends deprecated me until I cried.

(After I called him on the dangling participle in that, he reluctantly admitted that he'd made a mistake.)

Depravity- moral dishonesty or corruption; wickedness
The depravity in Brooklyn caused it to be nicknamed "Crooklyn."

(He seems to have something against Brooklyn. Should I cement his opinion of me by telling him my mother hails from Brooklyn?)

Virulent- extremely poisonous; full of hate
Virulent, I ran into hallway and screamed obscenities about the Busman.

Erudite- learned; scholarly; showing wide knowledge
Once again the erudite Dugandzic saved the academic neophyte from doom.

The next list is titled as follows:
Vocabulary is the "funeriestest"

No, I don't understand him either.

pedantic- overemphasizing rules and minor details
My Napoleonic mom pushed her pedantic personality on every relative at the party.

bourgeois- lacking in refinement
His burgeoning bourgeois attitude left him with no prom date.

palpitate- flutter
Palpitating, my heart nearly exploded as my prom date cascaded down the stairs in a river of silk and lace.

yahoo-a crude or brutish person
With the politeness of a teenage yahoo, I ran for the door knocking people over at the end of lunch period.

whammy- a supernatural spell; hex
If and when a whimsical whammy is tossed on your carcass, wear garlic!

froward- stubbornly contrary or disobedient
The froward baseball player was fined 3 dollars for failing to run out the grounder.

fulsome- loathsome; disgusting
Being a fulsome ferret, the neophyte scrambled for scraps in the celestial oasis.

greenhorn- an inexperienced or immature person
As the sun faded in Dugandzicland, the greenhorn, a pathetic piece of lumber, contemplated his paltry existence.

Now, all of that was before the events chronicled in my previous entry, wherein I face off against Dugandzic and emerge victorious (kind of). These, however, are new.

corker- someone or something that is remarkable
Suddenly, Mr. D., a real corker, completed a successful back flip over the student's desk.

caulk- to make watertight by packing the seams
Skillfully, the painter, caulked the fascia of the brick building.

(The baby Shakespeare weeps.)

demur- raise objections
After careful consideration, I demurred the school's decision to reduce my lunch period to ten minutes.

berserk- violent; deranged
On the last day of classes, the seniors, a herd of elephants ran berserk through the hallways looking for a freedom that didn't exist.

guano- substance composed mostly of dung
The load of guano all students use as excuses in the spring reeks of laziness and self-fulfilling delusions of grandeur.

(So if my delusions of grandeur are self-fulfilling, does that mean I'll become grand if I just believe I am?)

onus- a burden; a stigma
Unfortunately, a number of shortsighted seniors bear the onus of not graduating with their classmates.

odious- repugnant; offensive
Having ability and making excuses for not using it is as odious as lying to your mom on Mother's Day.

And the grand prize goes to...
denigrate-defame; belittle
While attempting to denigrate the hallowed Dugandzic, the academic punk, a bourgeois nimrod and scholarly fraud, actually drew light on herself and her copious shortcomings.

I think it speaks for itself quite satisfactorily.
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